There was a very lonely elf,
who hadn’t any friends.
He used to sit just by himself
and sing for days on end.

One day he spied a little hobbit
singing a Shire song,
And wondered where he was going
so he followed him along.

He came at last at 6 o'clock
to a wide and homely inn.
He kept up to the window
and tried to look within.

Through the molded glass he saw
many merry folk-
Hobbits and men and elves and dwarves
Drinking beer and mead and coke.

He wished to go in and join their fun
and walked towards the door,
But as he approached the step
he was knocked right to the floor!

T’was the little hobbit friend
who he followed to this place,
He bowed, greeted him and said, "Well met!
Come in and have a taste."

So, unsure at first, the elf stepped in
and was amazed at what he saw:
Trouts a’whacking, cookie munching,
And joyous folk galore!

He quickly made friends in there
And stayed long into the night.
Never again was that elf lonely
when he ventured to that site.

Do you know who that elf was?
TheHappyElf you all know well!
And now you know the reason
For his £30 a month phone bill.

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