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Hobnoblin and Gobtripe
by Old Took

From away deep underground,
there came a most unpleasant sound:
Like belching and grunting
and beer barrels shunting
Some goblins were wand'ring around.

Hobnoblin and Gobtripe were they.
Behind them foul odours they lay.
Vile green mists of smut
they emit from their butt
In a most toxic and obnoxious way.

"Hobnoblin," said Gobtripe one day
"There's something that I'd like to say:
I'm fed up of killin'
my food for my fillin'
I think that I'll start eatin' clay."

"You dozy old grubber" said Hob.
"Stop talkin' like you be a slob.
"We's goblin's no doubt,
so behave like a lout,
And get some raw meat in yer gob!"

So Gobtripe he took Hob's advice,
and took off his head in one slice!
With pepper and beer
and other things queer,
he actually tasted quite nice!

–Old Took

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